Week 8 - Week commencing 10th November - Work colleagues

Work colleagues is a scene we have only really improvised and not written properly, so we thought it best as a group to sit down and write it together. 

We want this scene to stand out from the rest a little like the chavvy lads scene, in the fact that it is quite cringe worthy and highlights a stereotype throughout society that men can be derogative towards women. Throughout this scene we have included a fair amount of sexual innuendos such as "I certainly would like to get involved in your eggs" and "I certainly like your muffins". We want Richard (who will be played by me), to be really leary towards Andy, like rubbing his crotch and perhaps placing his tongue into the side of his cheek, as well as trying very hard to be close to her as possible, and making moves on her whenever he can find an opportunity. We want Andy (who will be played by Beth) to be quite dismissive of Richard's advances and lewd remarks he makes towards her. In this scene we have a moment where Andy flips out and tell Richard what she really thinks of him. 

"Beth: Richard, you’re a dick. You think with your dick, you can’t keep your dick in your pants, you act like a dick, you speak like a dick, you look like a dick, you are just a fucking dick…"

Richard really loves himself, he sees himself as a big fish in a little pond, he thinks that he is a stud and that he can sleep with any woman he wants no matter what the circumstances and what the repercussions are afterwards. I think Andy is quite head strong and knows what she wants from life and she is not afraid to say how she feels. 

WORK COLLEAGUES FINAL SCRIPTWork colleagues enter the café, 

Lorna: (Cue for Music to go off) It is going to be a hard case because he is wanting be plead not guilty when it’s obvious that he is guilty… 

Beth: yeah… 

Awkward silence 

Lorna: So … what do you fancy for your lunch then? Ooo spotted dick… I had to get some cream for that once ha…Or how about an egg butty…Oh how about a muffin, I certainly like your muffins…(Grabs breast/bottom) 

Lighting change – Spotlight on Richard as Sally circles him 

Sally: This is Richard, also known around the office as dick. He likes to think of himself as top dog, a player, a big fish in a small pond. He really isn’t …Lights up 

Lorna: You are looking well you know Andy… 

Lighting change – Spotlight on Andy as Sally circles her. 

Sally: And here we have Andy, formally known as Andrea. Her and Dick used to be in a relationship until a certain someone decided to sleep with the office bike Sarah… 

Lights up 

Lorna: So you been going to the gym, working out? I go like 4 times a week (flex muscles ) can you tell? 

Beth: No (rolls eyes) 

Lorna: Look we had some good times didn’t we, especially in the disabled toilets at work? 

Pause…Sally mopping around at this point 

Lorna: Come on Andy you know we were good together. I’m great at sex, your… good at sex. So what about it then? For old times’ sake? 

Beth: Richard, you’re a dick. You think with your dick, you can’t keep your dick in your pants, you act like a dick, you speak like a dick, you look like a dick, you are just a fucking dick… 

Lorna: That was a bit uncalled for don’t you think love?!  Do you know what I was very generous when I said you were good at sex… it was like having sex with a mop. Damp and ridged … 

Beth: Prick (Knees in genitals) 

Richard makes a big song and dance out of the pain he is in and slowly leaves the stage.